Grade: { F- }

I feel like I haven't been a very strong Christian lately. I have let certain {bad} things/people surround me. I hate how sexual the world (my hometown) has become. Suddenly it's acceptable to say inappropriate things to just anyone.

Makes me feel a little sick to my stomach to even think about them.

I am all for joking around and having a good time and even being flirty at times.

This is what makes me think that I don't want to get married anymore. I know there are good guys out there, {This guy that I work with actually helped me see that last night} but I'm just not sure it's worth it, because most of the men in my life{married, in a relationship or single}, are not living like the men of God I thought they were. I know no one is perfect or right all the time..but they should know not to be that WRONG.

Agh!

On a lighter note, I am excited to spend some quality time with my one of my BFF's tonight. We had some good girl time on Saturday, and tonight will be so much fun. Even though we were together for a couple of hours on Saturday, there are still SO many things I want to talk and pray about with her tonight! ps-JSC I thought our cravings for food :) We have quite the interesting palates love!

ps- I wore my hair down and straight today..not sure how I like it :o/ BUT I do like some glasses I tried on yesterday,lets take a vote!!! Which one looks better?

He Has Risen!

Happy Easter!

The thing I love about this Holiday, is well, Jesus :) Easter signals hope and I love hope :)

I am working right now, from 7am-3pm today (can we say time and a half!?) and then hopefully going to my Aunties for a lovely Ham dinner! I love ham.

I want to thank everyone who has been praying for my family and I in our not so desirable situations that have been happening lately. I sure appreciate it!

Yesterday was good, considering. I was so sore that my manager at the optical office let me stay home from work. Thank you ND! So I went to brunch with my family then went out for coffee with KC & JS. I hadn't seen them in about a month, so it was good to check in and catch up. Then I went and gave Baby B her Easter presents (a photobook and teething rings) then went home to finish up some spring cleaning (call me lame, that's fine) and I get this phone call..that's right..a phone call! Not a text! It was my PB! Wondering how I was doing and how my weekend was going. He had e-mailed me earlier in the week saying how he was dreading this weekend because he had to move everything out of his condo on Saturday. That's all the time he had! So this weekend was going to be rough for him. So he was just kind of hanging out in his empty condo and wanted to check in. I told him I was being lame because I was kind of sore, and really..there wasn't much going on. So then he said we could hang out, and I was all over that! Of course I'm already in my PJ's and ready for bed (I know..and it was only 8:15!) so I was like okay...where should we meet? And he's all..well I can just come there, we can just hang out and catch up and chat. And all I could think is Thank you Jesus for putting me in a cleaning mood earlier in the day! So he came over, he drove 35 minutes(which totally blows my mind BTW) and I gave him a tour of my house, and we just sat on my couch and talked and talked and told stories and asked questions and just hung out. No TV, no radio, and it seemed like about a half hour had gone by and it had been 2 hours! And I had to work at 7, and he still needed to drive back to his buddies house where he'll be staying for the next couple weeks, which was about 45 minutes away. Plus he was tired from moving all of his stuff, and I was tired from just moving my crippled body all day, so we were pretty much falling asleep on the couch and yawning like crazy.
I can't even express in words how nice it was just to hang out with someone and have fun. We laughed so much, and it was just easy sitting there facing each other with our legs stretched out and talking. I hope it happens again soon. I'm just so happy to have a friendship that is 2 sided, not one person trying for more than what the other person wants. I hope that makes sense.

Whew! I need to take a break with the typing, because my wrists are getting a little sore, but there is a story about when I went to coffee that is quite interesting.

{UnTitled}

I am not doing good today. You would think I am PMSing, but I'm not! That was 2 weeks ago! But I am so dang emotional. I think it's partly I'm getting slightly depressed from being so sore. I mean..I already have limited movement as it is, and it's been taken away. I have to wake up a half hour earlier everyday because it takes me so much longer to shower, do my hair, get something to eat, forget about shaving my legs..I can't even get to my calf! So I feel gross..I feel ugly.



I think another thing that is making me sad is I just RSVP'd for my cousins wedding. For 1. So once again I get to have all of my family members, and I do mean all of them ask me why I can't get a guy. Do they really think that makes me feel good? I know I'm over reacting here, but I am lonely damnit. Which is so frustrating, because ML is such a nice guy, and honestly, he has done all those cutsie/cheesey things I have wanted a guy to do (brought me a coffee to work, picked me up from my house, text AND call me, put me on his facebook status that he was excited about dinner), so why can't I just be happy and be in a relationship with him? Am I being too picky? I just don't like that he drinks so much. I like going out for drinks and stuff, don't get me wrong, but there has to be more. Plus I feel like he wants too much too quickly. I am not ready to spend the night and have a pancake breakfast..plus, from what he tells me, he goes to church with his parents because that's just what he's always done. And when I ask him why, he's like well..its Sunday, it's just what you do. no no no NO. WRONG answer! I want a Godly man, who goes to church to worship our Savior, to feel the Holy Spirit (Thanks Mama).



Whatever, I've gone on a long enough tangent about this, again. God will bring him to me when He knows I am good and ready. We all know I'm lacking in the patience department :)







So back to my original thought, I am not talking to anyone until after my infusion, in hopes it'll perk up my spirits a little.

God Bless, Happy Easter!